You Can Eat Out Or You Can Have a Baby

The title of this post is a quote from my husband!!! :) Believe it or not!


Context:
My husband and I have been talking about having a baby. We've been married four and a half years and we both just graduated in May of 2007 from college. Basically, I have been begging him for a baby, but like most men he is scared to have a baby. He's afraid it will either make him "uncool," old, or fall terribly, terribly into debt.



* He's very very terrified of being in debt, which I might add is not a bad fear to have.



Anyway, one day I was once again trying to convince my dear husband that we needed a little Seth Jr to which he once again replied in financial talk. Basically, he said that we needed a certain amount of savings before we could think of having a baby. Now, I will say that I absolutely agree that financially, we're not ready for a baby. And I do agree that it will be much easier for me to take time from work and possible cut my hours completely if we had more in savings, so I applaud my dear husband for his financial goals! :) However, when I see my friend's babies, I don't really care about dollar signs - I just want a baby now, dang it! Okay, calm down....



So, Seth and I talked for several minutes about our financial plan and became excited about "living like we're poor" so we can have a baby and the more we save, the sooner we can have a baby. Then, Seth mentioned that at work I tend to go out to eat pretty often. After agreeing, I said, "Well, just say no to fast food. Except every once in a while, cause it's fun."



"No, no, no. We need to save EVERYTHING. So, basically, you can eat out....or you can have a baby."



"I think I'll take the baby," I said.



And with that....we went grocery shopping. But that shopping list is for another blog!

Latest Cake

Emma's first Birthday

The Ellie Face!

So, this weekend Hannah (from http://hannahnoelh.blogspot.com/) and I had a girls night. During this time, we watched a little Will & Grace and ate some microwave s'mores - we ate four each, actually! While doing this, we looked around the infinte world of blogging and saw The Little Lady, from our sister Rachel's blog at http://followinginmyshoes.blogspot.com/. The Little Lady makes the CUTEST "cheese" face.

After laughing 'til we hurt, Hannah and I decided that we would try and duplicate the infamous "cheese face." Although we are not nearly as cute as The Little Lady (Well, I should say that I am pretty cute and Hannah isn't so bad :) ), we tried our best!!

And then tried again....

.....And somehow we didn't seem as cute as The Little Lady. :>

Our dog is a virgin and don't you forget it!!

First, I would like to say that I love my husband!! He is soooo funny – even when he doesn’t try. The title of this quick blog came from a conversation we had this week while we were playing with our 3 month old puppy, Sadie. Sadie is ¾ boxer and ¼ pit bull, so she’s really not small!!

On Labor Day, Seth and I went canoeing with his family. His brother brought his dog, Otis. Sadie and Otis didn’t have much interaction. Sadie basically used him as a crashing pad. She was constantly head-butting him and jumping over him, like he was part of a ropes-course.

Late one night, Seth and I were outside playing with rambunctious Sadie and we both noticed that she’d grown so much since we got her three months ago. Laughingly, I made a comment about maybe be she was growing cause she and Otis got a little frisky. Seth kept responding a simple “no,” and I kept hassling him about it (jokingly) until finally he grabbed Sadie, put his hands over her floppy ears and said, “Sadie’s a virgin and don’t you forget it.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, we were both rolling on the grass with laughter. He had said what he truly felt as her “dad,” which was totally sweet. And there I was laughing because I’d never thought of dogs being virgins!!

Smelled like pennies

Okay, no disclaimer can take the shame and sheer embarrassment from this story. It was totally me! I can't deny it. I told this story for the first time at work yesterday. This will probably be the first time many of my family members will have heard this story.

.....Geez, my face is already turning red and the hives are just settling in.

Background:

My best friend, Holly, and I were both preacher's kids. We are not the "bad" preacher's kids that many often hear about. We were the MOST naive and innocent people in our whole high school! Seriously! Holly wasn't even allowed to say crap! Haha...I'm sure she loves me telling this now. We both had chemistry together with our teacher who delighted in our innocence and often called us the "good girls" of her class. Yes, we sucked up. Now move on!

One Thursday afternoon, our assignment included creating a series of chemical reactions and (if we performed them correctly) documenting their specific outcome. For example, some of our concoctions would turn color, fizz, etc. Just like any other day, Holly and I partnered and completed or assignment. Our last chemical reaction's response was the creation of an aroma that was metallic. Now, I didn't say we were the brightest bunch!

If it smells......your face might be too close

Instead of writing "metallic smell," I wrote "smelled like pennies." After dotting my i's and crossing all my t's, I turned my paper in along with the rest of the class in her "daily assignment" basket, located on her desk.

The next day was business as usual. Until chemistry class.

As the tardy bell rang, I asked my teacher, Mrs. J, if I could run to the restroom. After listening to a thirty-second lecture about using my time between classes wisely, I ran to the bathroom.

On my way back to the class, I heard a roar of laughter coming from my classroom. As I got closer, the laughter grew louder and louder and didn't stop! When I opened the door to my classroom, the laughter quickly evaporated and everyone stared at their desks, however I felt like their eyes were burning holes in my body.

Was this a horrible dream and I had returned from the bathroom naked? Good grief, no.

Did I have a bugger on my face? Nope, I alredy took care of that in the bathroom. :)

Did I forget to pull up my pants? (looked down) Whew, nope.

Were they just staring at my dashing good looks? Perhaps. Yes, we'll go with dashing good looks. And with that, I took my seat and found yesterday's assignment neatly placed on my desk. But, what was this? Red ink on my paper?? Holly and I had missed a point!? I turned to Holly and noticed that her face was red and she was trying to cover it with her hands.

Had we forgotten a question, I thought. Had we misspelled something (happened quite often). The only words I saw on the side of the paper were Mrs. J's own handwriting. It read: "How would you know??"

"How would I know?" I said. Well, if we did the assignment right, then I'd know.

Mrs. J then summoned me to her desk and asked if I would like my point back. "Sure," I said with caution, as Holly's head was now covered by her hands and jacket.

"Look at the question and then look at what you wrote," Mrs. J said as she began to blush. (I turned to the class thinking this was a trick question. Their eyes were now FIXED on me. Trust me, I knew my dashing good looks weren't the only thing they were thinking about....

Second mistake: reading aloud.

"Describe the chemical reaction that took place after mixing the chemicals: smells like penis. Smells like penis. SMELLS like penis. SMELLS LIKE PENIS? PENIS?!" [*can't believe I just typed that word - and in large font!*]

FIRST mistake: being born.

The class erupted in laughter as Mrs. J tried to stop the repeating of a foul word in class. I was so unfamiliar with this word that I was convinced I was saying PENNIES! But my paper said penis!! Not pennies! My face became so red and my eyes filled with tears. Holly came out from hiding just long enough to say, "Sarah, why did you write that? Why? WHY?" Then, like an ostrich, she returned to her hole.

"But...I ....no....pennies.....penis.....I mean, pennies. I ....I didn't write this! I wrote pennies! Pennies!"

After making a quick phone call to my friend at the FBI, a quick forensic analysis was done. Handwriting samples were taken and the good name of Sarah Sue was cleared. Upon closer look, it was noted that someone had erased the last half of my answer and boldly written another half. Thus, creating a whole new answer to the age old question of what happens when you mix two chemicals. The answer: should have stayed in bed.

Note: I normally do not use the word I typed above. I turned twelve shades of red just typing it!

SEMI - WORDLESS WENDNESDAY....

This is what I do when I don't clean teeth....I cause cavities!! :)

Coworker's 50th Birthday

Asher's Baptism Cake

Bumble Bee for Ellie's 1st Bday Cake

Flower

Flower #2

Test-cake for Ellie's 1st Bday

Ellie's Final 1st Bday Cake with edible flowers

Let me introduce you to my friend.....

I would like to make an introduction. APPARENTLY, you haven't met!!!

So, I would like to share some stories - related to my place of employment....

Just like Law & Order, I come equipped with a disclaimer:

The following stories are fictional and does not depict any actual person or event. ;)

DO NOT try this at home.

"So I tried whitenin' my teeth myself," an elderly farmer said, as he adjusted the worn out strap on his Big Smith overalls.

"Really? What product did you use?" The hygienist looks at his chart, scanning for which product they had recommended he use for whitening and thought to herself this was the first elderly farmer who had been interested in whitening his teeth. Hmm...

"Well, ah jus figur'd that them old whitenin' stripses all made uh bleach, ain't they?" He said.

"Well, each product may be a little different but the main ingredient is usually hydrogen peroxide. It's not really straight bleach." She said, laughing to herself at the thought of someone bleaching thier teeth with ACTUAL bleach........wait.

"Yeh, that'd prob'ly be why my teeth idn't white after I tried just bleach my wife had under the sink."

As he began to scratch the last little stubbles of hair around his ears, the young hygienist started laughing. What a kidder! What a kidder?!! When she turned around and saw that the old farmer was not laughing, she quickly sat down and asked him about his "bleaching" experience.

That young hygienist learned a lot that day:

1). Never judge a book by it's cover.

2). People will try anything.

3). Swishing with straight bleach will not whiten your teeth, but it will make your tongue red and swollen!

I may need speaking lessons, but you need a hearing-aid!!

Note: the names of these fictional characters have been changed to protect their identities.

The young hygienist got back from lunch and peeked at her afternoon schedule, secretly hoping that somehow all of her afternoon patients were out of town and rescheduled for some other day way, way in the future. Uhum...I mean she looked at her schedule and was elated at the amount of teeth she was going to get the pleasure to clean - because she loves her job ;).

She then walked to the waiting room door, opened it gleefully and said, "Harold?"

Silence.

"Is Harold here?"

Silence.

(Hygienists often worry about butchering a name [do you know that we have created 42 ways to spell Ashley?!], looking at all the females in the room when the name you're actually calling belongs to a man, or maybe even belching as you're saying "Sam" and having everyone in the waiting room stop what they're doing to point and laugh at you.

Well, they also hate it when they think someone is in the building that has not even arrived for their appointment yet! )

The young hygienist's face began to blush with every person that lifted their head to see who is calling "Harold" over and over again.

She walked quickly to the receptionist, nearly hugging the wall in hopes that her scrubs would blend into the surroundings.

"Receptionist....friend! I thought Harold was here? You have betrayed me? Was that a joke, making me repeat myself five times in front of a room full of patients??" The young red-faced hygienist said.

Before the young receptionist could even answer, an elderly man raised himself from his seat and began to walk toward the two young ladies. The young hygienist looked at him and realized that he fit Harold's description.

The man came to the reception area, leaned his elbow on the counter and said, "Did you say Harold or Jimmy?"

Chuckling to herself, the hygienist said, "Harold" and began to walk him back to her operatory.

"Well, it sounded like you said Jimmy," the old man growled.

(Hygienists do not like starting appointments off on the wrong foot either. It gets pretty uncomfortable being 8 inches from someone's face when you're angry at them.)

"Have there been any changes in your health history since the last time you were in?" the young hygienist routinely asks.

"WHAT?" the old man snapped, as he turns his whole body around in his chair so that he can make eye contact and let this young hygienist know that he is angry.

The young hygienist repeated herself and thought it was going to be a long fifty minutes!

Well, it didn't.

The fifty minutes crawled by as she cleaned his teeth in silence. Well, I guess the scratching of metal against teeth isn't quite silence.

As she pushed the button to slowly raise his chair into the upright position, she told him that she was going to fetch Dr. Clark for his exam.

"Did you say Dr. Frankenmeizerwitz?" Harold asked.

She wanted to say: Well, since Frankenmeizerwitz and Clark are so similar sounding, I can see how you were easily confused....but no, I said 'Clark.'

She actually rolled her eyes (because he could not see her face) and said, "No, I said Dr. Clark. I'll let him know we're ready for a check."

"Well, it sounded like you said Dr. Frankenmeizerwitz. You should enunciate."

She rolled her eyes so far back in her head that it hurt.

"Oh," she said laughingly, "sorry." (Hygienists also hate saying "sorry" when it's really NOT our fault. For example: Oh, your gums are tender during the cleaning? Perhaps had you used the fuzzy end of your toothbrush, they wouldn't be so red and inflamed. Perhaps.)

"You need speaking lessons. I can give them to you if you want - for about $120 an hour! Gosh....."

The young hygienist got up out of her chair, and with a smile said, "Hahaha.....I'll be right back."

On this day, the young hygienist thanked the Lord that she didn't have to see this patient again for six months and that she had put her three sharp instruments down on the tray before Harold began to speak. Oh, and thanked him that she put her dull one down too....cause that would have been more painful. :)

ADDED BONUS: (and no, I'm not a nerd)

Favorite dental hygiene t-shirts:

BE NICE. I COULD BE YOUR DENTAL HYGIENIST SOMEDAY.

Only brush the teeth you want to keep :)

Hygienists do it TWICE a day (with a picture of a toothbrush)

Unlike your relatives, if you ignore your teeth they will go away.

Cleaning your teeth was like a mini-makeover!

I run with scalers.

I thought I had a man's disease.....

So....I shouldn't watch documentaries about diseases, illnesses, and/or conditions.

I realized this after I began writing my last Will & Testament one Sunday afternoon following two documentaries about cancer and obesity. I started out wanting to take a nice long nap, so I turned on PBS. Oh, stop your ranting and raving about public television and how educational it is! Face it - it's boring! So, as I was drifting off into dreamland, I caught the word "symptoms."



Yes, this word seems to catch my attention because I want to make sure I haven't "caught" anything bad. So, I listened.......my heart began to pound. Was I having a heart attack? I'm too young! I haven't been on American Idol yet! Then, hives started to spread across my neck. Wait, when do I not have hives? That will be the day I know it's all coming to an end.

PBS man: "Do you have fatigue?"
Hypochondriac Sarah: "Yes..."

PBS man: "Do you have unexplained headaches?"
Sarah: "My head hurts now!" Note: not wearing contacts.



Then, it hit me like a ton of bricks.....I might have a brain tumor. Knowing that there might be a chance that I die, I sent a text message to my sisters and mom that I might be the owner of a brain tumor. Note: I am very serious about my being terrified about having a tumor. I make no light of cancer and its seriousness.


Well, after the cancer documentary, I became obese. I mean, I watched a documentary about obesity. They preached so much about not eating on the couch or watching so much tv and I nearly cried as I looked down and I was on my second helping of chocolate pudding! "I'm going to be obese," I said as I swallowed another dollop of chocolatey goodness. "Look at me, I can't stop!" I said, "AND I'm watching PBS!"

I shouldn't use the website http://www.webmd.com/.

Did you know that WebMD has a symptom checker? Yes, you simply put in your symptoms and it gives you a good idea what condition you might have. Did you know that I might have brain aneurysm? As well as IBS? As well as many other conditions? Yes, WebMD makes me an online hypochondriac. I could spend all day crying over my conditions with WebMD. It's a different condition every day! :(

And I shouldn't watch 20/20 either....

I hate to admit this....but I once thought I had a man-only disease. Yep. Even, as a child I was a little hypochondriac. I once though I would be considered an adult if I stayed up and watched 20/20 at 9:00 at night. (Oh, to be back in the day when 9pm was late!) Well, I watched Barbara Walters give a great report about some disease that I now cannot remember. I watched and I'm sure my little blue eyes became wider and wider with the thought of catching this disease. Later that night (probably during the late hour of 10pm), I rand downstairs crying to my mother about how I didn't want to die! She calmly asked me what I was dying of and when I told her that I had the disease from 20/20, she started laughing really loud.

How could she laugh at my dying? Did she really love me? Would she come to my funeral? Would I even get a funeral? Do people really know when they do or don't get a funeral?

Anyway......she then explained that only men got this disease. So, unless I was a man in a woman's body there was not a chance. Wait, would I know if I was a man in a woman's body??? What would be the symptoms? :)

DESPACIO!

After looking through my sister's blogs, I have become quite inspired to really get into this blogging thing. I don't have nearly as many wonderful things to write about daily - so, don't start your morning thinking you're going to read about my newsworthy life. No, I am sure I will use this more as a journal and perhaps a release from the stresses of cleaning people's teeth, being a wife - youth minister's wife, and a woman in general.

First - let's talk Costa Rica!

The Above picture was one of the nearly 400 I took in the week we were in Potrero Bay, Costa Rica. The sunsets were unfogettable and unbelievable! They were so different in color each day - truly showed God's glory. His gracing us with what some might think a simple sunset I'm sure is really a glimpse of the beauty heaven will bring! Each night, Seth and I either walked the beach looking at the beautiful sunset or we relaxed at our resort and watched the beautiful backdrop for the Catalina Islands. What an experience!

Backtrack -

When Seth and I landed at the Liberia airport, I was sure there was some kind of miscommunication. You see - normally, people land at an AIRPORT - not a shack! Come on, people! Seriously? Seriously! For my family - I equated their airport to Grandpa's big hay barn. You know the one with a roof and no walls! Yes, except the airport did have a grass roof!

After going through security and picking up our baggage, we left the airport and walked into what I thought must have been a dream. You see, I've always wanted to be a celebrity - and walk into a crowd of photographers who are screaming my name! You know that dream too? Well, my reality was more like a weird version of that dream. We exited the airport...or tried. We were stopped and surrounded by Costa Ricans holding up taxi signs and begging us to use their taxi. I knew our resort would be sending a driver, but where in the world was he?? I looked around, trying not to look any taxi drivers in the eye - as they all seemed to have the puppy face down pat! I can't say no to a puppy face! That's how I end up buying four tubs of poor-tasting cookie dough from the neighbors for the cheap price of $15.99 each! Finally, after scanning the crowd several times, we found Alex, our driver and were whisked away to Bahia del Sol.

Funny story - all of the main highways in Costa Rica are similar to our residential streets. Small and pretty well paved. Their smaller highways and residential roads are dirt roads! But not like your grandpa's dirt roads - these have craters that are too similar to cliffs!! Therefore, the drivers often have to so SUPER slow so they don't jostle you around too much. Seth and I weren't prepared for dirt roads, so we automatically assumed (I say 'we,' but I mean 'I') that Alex had stolen the "Mr. and Mrs. King" sign or had been and incredibly lucky guesser and was really more interested in cutting off our ears and sending them back to our American families for ransom!! I need me ears! How else will I wear headbands??!! Back to the story.....

Finally, after an hour of driving, I saw signs for our resort. And may I say - oh my goodness! What a resort! The online pictures did no justice! (http://www.potrerobay.com/) They should hire me to take their website photos!! :) It was amazing!! Oh, the best thing ever!? They accidently overbooked thier resort and when they did, they had to move us up to a SUITE! I SAID SUITE! Instead of a normal hotel room with a mini-fridge, we got an apartment!! It was huge! And the upgrade was free!! We almost upgraded when we were making reservations, but decided not to at the last minute! Boy are we glad!!

Another quite funny story: First - I would like to remind you that Seth and I are both college graduates. I would normally say that we are two pretty intelligent people...on this trip, however, we weren't. I'll use the blazing sun as the excuse for our stupidity. So, Costa Rica's currency is Colones. There are 500 colones to the US dollar. So, that means 500colones = $1, right? Wrong, according to Seth and Sarah King. Yes, that's what I said...you're wrong. We're right. Yep...right and poor. Why, you say? I will tell you.

On our first full day in beautiful Costa Rica, Seth and I took a taxi-jeep into Playa Flamingo to get some groceries for our SUITE with a full kitchen! (just had to put that in there). Well, we felt we were rushed so we said, "okay, 500 is half of a thousand. So, a thousand is a dollar. So, take everything and divide the number by two and it will convert it to U.S. Dollars. So, 5000 colones would be two dollars and fifty cents. Sweet, grab what you need!" So, after we ran through the store that was the size of my living room, we realized that Costa Rica grocery stores were like a steal! We can get all kinds of stuff for ... like nothing! When we got to the cash register and the lady told us it would be 32,000 colones. "Sweet, 16 dollars!" I said. Then, Seth and I decided we didn't want to spend our cash, so we'd just use our debit card. Yay for debit cards, that is if you know how to do basic math. The shock finally came when we realized that we HAD spend $16. Yep, sixteen dollars....plus 48!! And would you like to know what we spend sixty four dollars on? Well, two great pairs of dollar-store goggles (kid size because that's all they had) and two pair of "hiking" shoes.......otherwise known as crocks. $64 on cheap crocks and dollar store goggles! AND THE CROCKS GAVE ME BLISTERS! I spend $64 on blisters! Yikes.

Oh, does anyone know what Despacio means? I ask this because when Seth and I were driving our little scooters, I often saw a sign that said Despacio. Although I didn't know what it meant, I enjoyed using my Costa Rican old man voice. It sounds like what Antonio Banderas might sound like after smoking for thirty years or so. A little grunge + a little Antiono = DESPACIO! Seriously, every time we drove by, Antonio popped right out!

This pic was actually taken on our last full day in Costa Rica. After scooter-ing all over the coast, paying way too much for souvineers, and hiking around the beaches and rainforest - we had to come home....to Missouri.